My aunt and I in Old Orchard Beach, Maine. Last month my only aunt on my dad’s side passed away suddenly in her sleep. We weren’t close at all and barely talked since my grandmother’s death in 1996.
My aunt had acted like she didn’t want to have anything to do with us (me, my mom and my sister) so essentially we went our separate ways. It wasn’t a hard thing for me to do, since she said some pretty nasty things to me when we visited my grandmother in the hospital.
On the night that she passed, I had a really strange and disturbing dream about my father (who passed in 1991). I was walking with him and he told me he felt dizzy. I told him to hang on to my arm for balance. We came to some stairs and as he started going down them, he fell, in achingly slow motion, down the stairs until he landed on his back. I ran to him and he was crying, trying to sit up, and he said, “I’m sorry. I am so sorry.” I told him it’s OK, just don’t move.
I knew he was telling me sorry for leaving me, at the age 18. I know he is sorry and I accept that he is gone.
Another strange synchronicity is the day my aunt left Oregon to drive to New Hampshire was May 24th, the anniversary of my father’s death. By the time she made it to New Hampshire, she was gone.
Now being a natural and practicing medium for over three years, I figured she would show up soon after she passed and she did, along with my grandmother and my father. I was surprised they ALL showed up in my bathroom, of all places, to talk to me. I mean I have been in touch with them but they pretty much stay on the Other Side (like healthy spirits do).
This is how the conversation went:
Aunt: Tina, I am so sorry about what I did and said, I really felt close to your mom.
Me: You did? Because you really didn’t show it. You didn’t even talk to us for 20 years.
Aunt: Yes I really did, I wish I had done many things.
Grandpa: I wish I had told you more about my family history, especially when you asked about all the old pictures I had.
Dad: I wish I had tried hard and stayed longer with you.
Me: Well it’s too late, there’s nothing we can do about it now. Next time, if you incarnate, TRY HARDER.
Was I being harsh? Yeah! I couldn’t believe I was getting all little this remorse. I mean, isn’t it a little late for this?
All three of them died fairly young. My grandmother was very overweight and died of liver problems in her 60s. My dad passed away next, of a massive heart attack at the age of 46 (yes that is NOT a typo). My aunt died in her 60s too. They were all big people and they have one thing in common: they gave up because now they are expressing all this remorse to me.
All can NOT be well when you pass. When you go to the Other Side, you have much more awareness and a hold of the big picture. But if you didn’t do the things you wanted to do and experience, guess what, you’ll regret it.
Yes life is hard. A life on Earth is not for the faint of heart.
But you have to make the most of what you have. You have to find joy in your life. You have to treat yourself well and be healthy so you can live a long time.
I felt like my grandmother, my dad and my aunt all gave up.
They just couldn’t deal with life.
And guess what, they regret it.
Don’t let that be you.
Do your best and never stop trying. When you fall, get BACK UP. And keep going. Everything’s temporary. Trust me. If you wait long enough, your back will stop hurting, that headache will go away and that person you hate at work will quit their job.
Now go out there and live your life and never ever give up!